Expecting to Be Expecting

“At what point do you give up?” or “How much longer are you willing to wait?”

I have been asked both of these questions several times. I’ve been told I am crazy for continuing to believe. I have been accused of being in denial.

The truth is I’m not just hoping we will one day conceive a miracle. I am not somewhat sure that it might happen to us. I’m not throwing up random prayers and crossing my fingers that they will get answered. Instead, it’s the opposite. When I think of our journey, what comes to mind is:

I’m expecting to be expecting.

I’m expecting God to fill my womb with life. I’m expecting to be pregnant. I’m expecting to be a mom to many children. I’m expecting a miracle to take place.

Isn’t that what scripture tells us to do? To call things as though they are even when they aren’t yet (Romans 4:17). To take God at His Word (Romans 4:18). To be confident that He will do what He has promised (Romans 4:21).

I’m not denying our circumstances. I’m not denying how long we have been waiting. I’m not denying the odds are stacked against us and that things in the natural look hopeless. I’m not denying any of it. What I am denying is for God’s Word to not have the final say in and over our situation. I refuse to trust anything over what He has spoken.

I think most people would assume that after a 7 year wait, the weariness kicks in and the less likely it is for us to still believe. But, I can tell you this, it is the exact opposite for us. Our expectancy, in fact, has grown. With each month that passes, we grow more and more expectant.

Romans 8:24-25, MSG, says, “That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting. We, of course, don’t see what is enlarging us. But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy.

Each day that passes when a woman is pregnant, her belly grows bigger. And each day that passes, she becomes one day closer to meeting her baby. And just as Romans says, the joy builds in her as well.

I can’t think of a better analogy for our journey; it’s as though this verse was written for me. With each day that passes, the expectancy grows.

Now, I didn’t get to this place overnight. I have had to daily renew my mind with truth. I have had to daily remind myself of God’s promises over myself and my family. I have had to choose to worship when I didn’t feel like. I have had to speak declarations that look much different than my circumstances. I have to continually sow seeds even though I haven’t yet reaped a harvest. I have had to shut out all the negativity and doubt from those around me. And, I have had to take God at His Word and believe in fact, that He will fulfill every promise He has spoken.

What is it that you are waiting for and what are you expecting? I hope whatever it is, especially if it’s a baby, that you too are expecting to be expecting.

“I pray with great faith for you, because I’m fully convinced that the One who began this glorious work in you will faithfully continue the process of maturing you and will put his finishing touches to it until the unveiling of our Lord Jesus Christ!” Philippians 1:6

“Because we don’t focus our attention on what is seen but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but the unseen realm is eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:18

“Then I will say to my soul, don’t be discouraged, don’t be disturbed, For I fully expect my Savior-God to break through for me. Then I’ll have plenty of reasons to praise him all over again. Yes, living before his face is my saving grace.” Psalm 43:5

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