He is Faithful – Part Four

The Lord is so sweet. Wow. He continues to blow me away. Every month Colby and I go into a cycle believing that it will be the month we will be able to celebrate a pregnancy. We are waiting expectantly, asking boldly, and believing our miracle is coming soon. This month my cycle was 5 days late and I thought I was pregnant. I never took a test, but on the 5th late day, AF made a visit. As always, the Lord comforted me. Don’t get me wrong, I was sad. I never lost hope. I was never mad. I never doubted the promises God has for us. I just was sad. Melanie reminded that sadness is a real emotion, but it’s what we do with the emotion that matters most.

I decided to deal with the sadness by digging into the word. As scripture says, Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning. Psalm 30:5 This was most definitely the case. The Lord told me when I woke up the next morning that He already has an appointed time of when our babies will be born. There is an appointed time for everything. Ecclesiastes 3:1 He knows the details down to the exact second. He already knows our babies names and He already knows everything about their future. It just blows me away that He works every single detail out for our good. I mean, think about it – our future children have to be at the exact place at the exact time to meet their future spouse. Not only the meeting of their spouse, but the day they start kindergarten, the day they go to college, or meet a lifelong best friend (maybe even at an airport), etc.  He has planned their whole future already and has already done the math to back into the exact second that I will conceive. He will use the perfect sperm and perfect egg to create our precious children. I’m grateful it wasn’t this month, because then it wouldn’t be the kids that He already has planned. Why was I late 5 days? I don’t know! But I do know that I’m grateful because those 5 days are setting up the cycle for when we will conceive. When He reminded me of this it brought me so much comfort. I wish I could convey this better in words, but it just blows my mind that I don’t even know how. Wow, Thank you Lord.

Of course the day continued to get better. I had so much precious time with the Lord and spent a long time reading Judges 6 and 7 about the story of Gideon. The Lord asked Gideon to reduce his army size from 35,000 to 10,000. After Gideon obeyed, the Lord then asked him to reduce his army size from 10,000 to 300. 300!! Keep in mind the Midianites army was 135,000. Can you imagine going into a battle with 300 warriors knowing that you are going to face an army of 135,000? Talk about obedience to the Lord. What I loved more than anything about this story was if Gideon’s army still had 35,000 soldiers and won the battle they would have received all the glory. But, instead God wanted everyone to know it was nothing that Gideon did right. It was everything but that. With only 300 soldiers God would receive all the glory. What seemed like nothing (300 soldiers), God turned into a winning battle!!! For us, what seems like nothing (0 sperm), God is going to make babies out of it. He takes nothing and makes it something. All for His glory. This just amazes me. Gideon put all of His trust in the Lord and the Lord encouraged him and guided him. Because of this experience Gideon’s character and faith grew. Praise the Lord.

There was so much I loved about Judges 6 and 7. Besides the story of the battle between Gideon and the Midianites here are some other favorites.

  • 6:3 – If God would have left the Israelites alone, they would have suffered tremendously. God didn’t want this, so he sent them to be ruled by the Midianites.
  • 6:6 – The Israelites hit rock bottom before turning to God. If they would have obeyed the Lord to begin with, they would have avoided all the suffering.
  • 6:12 – Despite the circumstances, they were reminded the Lord was with them.
  • 6:13 – Gideon felt like God had forsaken Him, but Israel is the one that had forsaken God.
  • 6:15 – God promised strength to overcome the opposition
  • 6:16 – God promised Gideon He would be with him

Who else is excited about this right now? The Lord has just overfilled my cup with his joy and peace. I can’t get enough. Oh, and then he reminded me the following morning that if I would have been pregnant I would have missed out on all this precious time with Him. I would take learning more about the Lord’s sovereignty over being pregnant any day of the week! Thank you Lord for your sweet pursuit of me and that you love me enough to have every second of every day planned out. Wow!!!!

What have you been sad about? How do you handle your emotions? Spend time with Him – He is so faithful and always brings joy in the morning!

PS I don’t know Holly that well, but she is a blogger who has been going through a lot this week. Please consider stopping by her blog to leave her some love and/or pray for her.

photo (81)

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21 Comments
  • Megan Davis
    Posted at 05:52h, 01 November Reply

    “But I do know that I’m grateful because those 5 days are setting up the cycle for when we will conceive”

    Wow! This is such a beautiful post and an amazing reminder! I love the perspective God revealed to you and the faith you cling to when the world around you doesn’t make sense. Praying for you!!

    “Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord! ” Psalm 27:14

  • Elisha
    Posted at 08:53h, 01 November Reply

    I love this! I was actually reading about the story of Gideon last night…how ironic? I kept thinking as I read, “wow! I want faith like that!” Thank you for sharing 🙂
    And yes I agree with you about the “perfect time”. I always pray each month that He would give me a child of promise…not just a child when I want the child, but the child that God has for me in His special time. A couple of months ago I was praying to God and just simply being real with Him. I asked Him why this wasn’t the perfect time because to me, yesterday was the perfect time. lol! He quietly reminded me that He has something amazing planned for my children…plans for their lives that only He wants them to do and if I rush His plan and His purpose for their lives, then I am being selfish. ouch! So each month that my cycle starts I just remind myself that God has something so awesome planned for my children’s future and I don’t want my selfish desires to ever stand in the way of His ultimate plan for their lives. God is good…He is never late and always on time. love ya girlie! xoxoxo

  • Jessica
    Posted at 09:10h, 01 November Reply

    Amen girly. I am so sorry to hear this week has been rough, but so thankful for what God is teaching you. He knows the moments and those will be perfect, more than we could ever plan ourselves. Can’t wait to celebrate with you and Colby when that day comes and as we all wait, we will celebrate still. God is good!

  • Kara
    Posted at 09:40h, 01 November Reply

    What a great correlation to the story of Gideon! I had completely forgotten about how God requested that of Gideon, and he obeyed even though it sounded like a terrible idea. We know that God has the perfect timing for you and Colby! And I’ll pray for patience for you guys to wait on His timing whenever that may be 🙂 Thankful we can rely on our Lord when times are tough! xoxo

  • Natalie
    Posted at 09:44h, 01 November Reply

    You never cease to amaze me with every blog entry I read. You are such a passionate and awesome woman, dear!! I am still praying for you and Colby. Thank you for inspiring me and so many others. <3

  • Charity
    Posted at 11:38h, 01 November Reply

    Whew you’ve done it again my friend!! Thank you for sharing your heart. Emotions are so real. I usually try and surpress mine but as if late I’ve been trying my best to get them out and to hand them over to God. I love the story you shared about Gideon what great obedience. Oh and what you said about the perfect time is so true. God has it all planned perfectly…thanks for this beautiful reminder.

  • Amie
    Posted at 12:36h, 01 November Reply

    Oh I just LOVE this Caroline! While of course everything is from our Lord I just love times that clearly show it was the Lord that made something happen/not happen and for what reason. It’s just awesome!!

  • dspence
    Posted at 13:35h, 01 November Reply

    I absolutely LOVE reading this. Thank you, thank you. Every time you write, the Lord opens my eyes and heart a little further.

  • Kim Adams Morgan
    Posted at 14:10h, 01 November Reply

    Caroline,

    Love this>> Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes in the morning! His sweet love comforts us and calms us from all our sorrows and fears. He gives us strength to dream our big dreams, knowing He is at our side every step of the way. Love how you share your heart so openly. I would love for you to guest post for me on this subject, if you are open to it?

    As I opened the door each time last night for trick or treaters, I felt my eyes filling with tears as I talked with the little ones about their costumes and their night. I still wonder sometimes what could have been. But then quickly remember that God has blessed me abundantly in so many other ways.

  • Jane
    Posted at 14:14h, 01 November Reply

    I’m sorry you have been having a rough time. That is an awesome story in scripture – thanks for sharing what you have been learning!

  • Lisa
    Posted at 18:07h, 01 November Reply

    Thanks for another beautiful post, Caroline.

  • Becky
    Posted at 21:10h, 01 November Reply

    I LOVE being able to take a step back and think about how the Lord works everything in perfect timing for our benefit. My mom struggled with infertility when she tried to get pregnant with me. It took her 2 years to get pregnant with me. If she had gotten pregnant right away, I’d be 2 years older right now and I never would have met David or have the life that I have. It just blows my mind how He has planned generations and He knows how it’s all woven together. It’s so beautiful!

  • Chrissie
    Posted at 22:20h, 01 November Reply

    Oh bless you sweet one, I remember all too well the hope that comes with a late cycle and the crushing disappointment that can follow. Praying with you for peace and hope and trusting that God’s good gifts are waiting for you in His perfect timing. Your faith is beautiful and inspiring. Thank you for sharing x

  • Emily (eatloveprocreate.blogspot.com)
    Posted at 07:24h, 02 November Reply

    I just love how anyone dealing with MFI could literally replace Gideon’s “soliders” with the word “sperm” and see the parallels there. Love it!

    You are amazing as always. Love that you didn’t stay in your funk too long and were able to proceed with life with such joy!

  • Kasey
    Posted at 14:29h, 02 November Reply

    Thank you for this reminder. All in His time!

  • Jennifer T.
    Posted at 21:59h, 02 November Reply

    Wow, thank you for your faith! This is such an uplifting post, yet it is so true. I am thankful for your example and strength. This is a wonderful reminder of many things, but also a personal reminder to me that I need to make more time reading and studying the scriptures as they truly can bring peace and joy. Thank you again! I’m sorry for your sadness but admire your ability to bounce back so quickly. Hugs!

  • Amy
    Posted at 22:42h, 03 November Reply

    Caroline! This is such an encouraging post! My heart felt sad for you when I read that this was not the month for you, but After I finished reading, the song and Bible verse “He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it” popped into my mind! (Phillippians 1:6) I love that God blessed you with insight, closeness and comfort while you were pressing into Him in spite of (or because of) your sadness. What a great example to me you are, in that you used those 5 days for preparation for your “due time.” You are such a blessing and I am always blown away by your posts! I’m praying for you and Colby daily, friend!

  • Angela
    Posted at 23:59h, 03 November Reply

    Girl, your faith is seriously inspiring and encouraging!! This is my first time stopping by, but I love what I read. 🙂

  • Bridget Meleski
    Posted at 21:02h, 04 November Reply

    Hey girly I’m sorry to here about AF :(, but am so grateful how GOD turned your sadness into good. You are truly blessed and thanks for sharing you keep me going thru the sad days!

  • Finley
    Posted at 04:30h, 05 November Reply

    woo hoo this is awesome!!! Woah. To be in your brain right now 🙂 Your faith in the Lord is just so so inspiring!! the way you turn to Him without hesitation is just beautiful!! and your perspective on this is just amazing!!! What a woman!!! (did you get all those adjectives hehe)
    I am emailing this to the hubby right now – your Gideon comparison is FANTASTIC!!! Going to re-read that 🙂

  • Ann
    Posted at 12:34h, 08 November Reply

    Your post has encouraged me a lot!!! for am going through a similar phase…

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